Friday, January 18, 2013

#89 ~ Create and Keep a Log of the Silly Things My Children Say

So, I have spent a good bit of the last few days working on the log of silly things my children have said. I spent a good bit of time scroll back through the last few years of Facebook posts to find some of these too.

I have to say I had a great laugh remember some of these!

While doing this, as well as looking through Pinterest I came up with a plan to use some of the best quotes as well as knock out one of the tasks I found on Pinterest.

I plan to when I get the time to make a few of those canvas signs with lettering, but of course the lettering will be my children's quotes and instead of inspirational sayings. I already have some ideas for a couple of the signs and I am really looking forward to working on the project when I get the time and supplies to do it! Of course I shall share on here the progress!

Anyway, I have my log in document form at the moment on my computer for my personal use but I shall copy and paste it below to share it with everyone else. I hope it provides some laughs for you just as it did for me and I certainly plan to keep updating the log as they say more and more goofy things!

Enjoy!

PS: The log is done with the most recent sayings first and then goes backwards by date.


Silly Sayings the Taylor Children Say

Random Phrases:

Layn ~
"All that cheese!"
"I am having some hot air"
"Gatorraider"
"Go up the hidle"

Alyssa ~ 
"Wonder weart"
"Commit!" (for come with)
"Baby soup" (bathing suit)
"Bag of shitties" (bag of fishies)
"Milkatay"
"Crackatay"
"yogatay"
"Banamanam"

Statements By Date:

Layn ~ January 18, 2013
As I was walking Layn home today from school he was telling me about what he learned in class regarding Martin Luther King Jr. Part of the conversation went like this.
Layn: "Mommy do you know how old he was when he died? He was still young! He was 39! If he were still alive today he'd be 82, but then he would be dead."
I go on to explain how many people live past 82 into their 90s and some over 100.
Layn: "Even 1000?!"
I laugh and explain that people don't get quite that far.
Layn: "Well, I am going to be the first person to live till 1000!"

Alyssa ~ January 17, 2013
Sean: "You miss Santa?"
Alyssa: "No!  He is already back at the moon!"

Layn ~ January 12, 2013
So, Sean is getting ready to head out to the store to pick up a couple of things. Layn is going on and on about how he wants lunchables. We explain to him that we won't be buying them because they are full of crap and not good for you. I go on to explain about how we can get crackers, cheese, and meat and make our own which will be a better alternative. Layn doesn't like this and continues to rant and even goes so far to say he doesn't like, "our stupid plans!" I tell him if he doesn't like them he can find another house to stay at and Sean points out that this is how it works and how we don't always like all the stupid plans he comes up with. Layn yells back, "I don't have stupid plans!"

Alyssa ~ December 27, 2012
Heading south on the Turnpike to Alyssa chanting from the back, "Where's the beach?! Where's the beach?!"

Layn ~ November 21, 2012
Layn walks up to me with a serious look on his face.
"Mommy, I am a robot. The red inside of me isn't blood it's red paint, no really it's paint. This way if my skin melts off I will still have a pretty color because my paint is dry! Do you know where my engine is? It's right here in my stomach and there is a self destruct button inside my engine and DON'T ever touch it!"

Layn  ~ November 5, 2012
So, earlier I was having a talk with Layn about how I didn't want him and his sister playing on my elliptical because they have a tendency to break everything they touch. The very next minute Layn proved to me yet again just how much he is like his father.
He began to go around the house touching various things and remarking how they didn't break.
Yep it is true if you breed with a smart ass you get little smart asses as a result.

Alyssa ~ November 3, 2012
So, Alyssa comes over to me and starts rambling about chocolates. She goes on for a few minutes and I stare at her then say, "Alyssa your negotiation skills are confusing."
Sean: "I think that is her objective."
Me: "I think she said she wants to eat one chocolate and then two chocolates."
Alyssa: "Mmmhmmm that's my story!" ~stuffs chocolate in her mouth~

Alyssa ~ October 17, 2012
My little girl who use to freak out when a bug was near just waltzed up to me to show me what looks like a very squished bug on her finger. I asked if she killed the bug.
"Yes! Because I want to catch them with my fingers and died them with my feet!"

Layn ~ October 14, 2012
Lol, Layn is watching Harry Potter too and we are watching the sixth one. The scene where they show the memory of a young Voldemort asking Slughorn about horcruxes comes on. Layn asks if it is Harry without glasses and I respond in the negative and inform him it's Voldemort. Layn begins to say the following, no joke.
"Well he is starting to not have a nose. Voldemort doesn't have a nose, you know? Yeah he is starting to not have a nose...why doesn't Voldemort have a nose?"

Layn ~ October 7, 2012
Having a discussion with Layn about his school lunches.
Layn: Mommy you know what you never put in my lunch before? Cookies, I'd like cookies! (Side note here cookies in this house are usually all gone before I get around to making his lunch)
Me: Well part of the reason I stopped giving you things like applesauce, carrots, and such with your sandwiches is because you wouldn't eat the sandwiches. So, I told you I'd give you the sandwiches only until you showed me you were going to eat them again.
Layn: Well I just followed my thoughts and...(he babbles on here about not liking the cheese in his sandwich and so he skips eating it, of course he never told me this before so I had no way of knowing.)
Me: (amused I look at Sean) You hear this? He followed his thoughts, our boy has a mind of his own, we are in big trouble now!
Layn: Well duh, everyone has a brain just so you know!

Layn ~ September 24, 2012
Sometimes humor ensues when Layn misspeaks a word.
Layn and Sean are heading out to go to school and he walks up to the door and then turns to us as says, "Did mommy suffer the door?"
I had to ask him to repeat what he said and after hearing it a second time I stare at him for a moment and then say, "I don't think that word means what you think it means."
Sean after a chuckle asks Layn if he meant "secured" and after an affirmative they head out while I remark that I did not think one could suffer a door.

Alyssa ~ August 22, 2012
Conversation with Alyssa.
Me: Alyssa where is the dirty diaper you took off? (She wears pull ups but still calls them diapers)
Alyssa: The diaper was dirty.
Me: Yes, okay where is the clean diaper I gave you?
Alyssa: ~she points to the diaper she is wearing~ It's right here!
Me: Okay now where is the dirty yucky diaper you took off?
Alyssa: Well I tried to throw it away but my feet are very tired.
I stare at her blankly for a moment.
Me: Alyssa, so where IS the dirty diaper?
Alyssa: Oh it's right over here! ~she runs off and picks it up off the living room floor~
I directed her to the trash and she threw it away giggling the whole time.

Alyssa ~ July 4, 2012
I was saying something to Sean and used the word "shit" in the sentence. Alyssa who was sitting with me at the time pipes up with, "Mommy I don't want to say shit, I'll say candybars."

Layn ~ June 27, 2012
Sean was trying to tell me something but didn't want Layn to know what it was and since he can spell Sean was using the military alphabet, thus the convo went like this.
Sean: "Hey Aimee do you want me to get Bravo Romeo Echo Alpha Kilo Foxtrot Alpha Sierra Tango?"
Aimee: "Um Foxtrot Romeo Oscar..."
Sean: " Mike"
Aimee: "Mike, Whiskey...I don't know horatio?"
Sean: "It's Hotel."
Aimee: " Oh Hotel, well from where?"
Then before Sean answers Layn goes...
Layn: "Oh I can try! Horatio, Crazy, This is awesome!"
Nice laugh to start off what is to be a crazy day.
Three Cheers to the Birthday Boy! Layn is Six today!!!! I hope to have many more funny stories to share about my crazy Layn in the years to come!!!!!

Layn ~ June 23, 2012
Layn and Alyssa are playing. I hear this from Layn to Alyssa, "No! Alyssa you're going to break that! Stop! You're a mom! Mom's don't break stuff!"

Layn ~ June 16, 2012
I love how Layn can run around almost non-stop all day long, want to practically live outside and play. Yet when I decide it is a nice day and I could use the exercise to walk him to his friend's birthday party because she doesn't live too far all I hear is...
"Mommy it's so hot!"
"Mommy are we almost there, I'm tired."
"Mommy I need some water!"
"Mommy is that her house?"
"Why does this take so long?"
"Why couldn't we just drive there?"
And any other number of ways he could say all that the entire walk.

Layn ~ June 13, 2012
Conversation with Layn.
Layn: "No, Alyssa go away before you throw up and explode my computer!"
Me: "What does throwing up have to do with making a computer explode?"
Layn goes on to provide the explanation that it could get into the cords and go up into the computer.
Sean: "What is it alive?!"
Me: "Yeah if throw up is alive then I give up!"
Sean: "yep just give up on life!"
Layn goes into giggling fits.

Layn ~ June 2, 2012
Layn and Alyssa are arguing over a computer mouse and so I intervene by taking said mouse.
Layn: "Hey what are you doing?!"
Me: "I'm taking the mouse because I am mommy and you know what that means don't you?"
Layn: "You're crazy?"

Layn ~ May 29, 2012
This morning as I was getting Layn ready for school, he was asking why I was so tired. I explained how I woke up in the middle of the night with a bad headache. "Oh well you should have woke me up mommy so I could have taken care of it for you!" then a little bit later when I yawned he said, "You can go back to bed mommy I'll wake up daddy and make his coffee!"

Alyssa ~ May 29, 2012
Alyssa asked for chocolate milk and I made it for her, she then follows me around going, "Mommy you carry it to the table, I'll be your best friend!"

Layn ~ May 6, 2012
Me: "Layn would you like cheesy potatoes or seasoned potatoes with dinner?"
Layn: "Seasoned because I like seasons!"
Me: "Oh yeah, what are your favorite seasons?"
Layn: "Spring and Summer!"

Layn ~ April 26, 2012
Layn: "My butt was just freaking me out because I was sitting there too long so it freaked me out."

Layn ~ February 26, 2012
A moment of parent error. I am clearing the table off and pick up a piece of Layn's work from school. I show it to Sean and say, "hey did you see the cool robots Layn made?" Sean does his oooo's and ahhhh's and then asks when he made it. I go over to Layn and ask him when he made the robots? He looks at me, sees what I am holding up, scowls and points at me, "Those aren't robots, those are snowmen!" Never assume anything with children!

Alyssa ~ December 1, 2011
Well according to Alyssa we have "flup" in our "chowch".  (fluff in the couch)

Layn ~ November 24, 2011
Layn working on his German.
Layn: "How do you say I am in German?"
Sean: "Ich bin."
Layn to me, "Mommy I am Ich bin thirsty!"

Layn ~ September 24, 2011
A friend of ours who is moving away dropped off his groceries for us to have and since I was exhausted last night I left the canned goods in the container. This morning The children decided to explore it. Layn grabbed a can of Bush's Grilling Beans and the following scene occurred. Layn, "Oh yes! Metallica!" He begins to start dancing about and playing the can of beans like a guitar. Layn, "Look mommy Metallica beans!".

Layn ~ August 24, 2011
Layn got all excited and wanted me to come into the living room and see something. I walk in to see that Alyssa got ahold of the baby powder and decorated the couch and the floor with it, thus emptying the bottle. I begin to explain how we can't go buy anymore and that she best not ask for any for her diaper changes as she always does. Layn then says, "Well there is plenty on the couch!"

Layn ~ August 23, 2011
Me: "Alyssa will please leave the basket of dirty clothes alone!"
Layn: "Sorry, we can't control ourselves! We just want to keep doing stuff that is fun!"

Layn ~ June 2, 2011
Sean was talking about spanking when Layn asked him why he would want to spank me when I wasn't in trouble. Sean said that I was in trouble but he'd spank me later, Layn responds with the best statement of all. "Why is she in trouble when she's the boss?"

Layn ~ May 6, 2011
A moment ago Sean had another one of his episodes where pain shoots through his head. Layn came over and asked what was wrong while holding Alyssa's paper jams guitar. Sean explained how the bad guys when he was in Iraq hurt him so now he has head pain everyday. Layn responds with, "Well I got to go to Iraq and kill those bad guys!" Sean asked him how he was going to do that, Layn says "With this guitar!"

Layn ~ April 29, 2011
Sean in trying to distract Layn told him to "go ask mommy why the sky is blue." Layn proving yet again what a smart ass he can be came over to me and said, "Go ask daddy why the sky is blue."

Layn ~ April 16, 2011
So, Layn was running about and he tripped. His reaction was to pull from Sean's book of complaints and yell, "I don't like this house anymore because it makes me trip!"

Layn ~ April 1, 2011
Sean was getting the children cereal this morning. We were low on Reeses Puffs so Sean made Layn a mix of those and Cap'n Crunch. Then Layn went on like a ten minute whine fest about how he didn't want it because "Chocolate peanut butter cereal is for the day and cap'n crunch is for the night!" Sean threatened to dump it on his head if he mentioned cereal again. Layn just finished his bowl of cereal.

Layn ~ March 10, 2011
So, I was getting ready to change Alyssa's diaper and Layn comes up to me and says, "Mommy can I change Alyssa's diaper all by myself because I'm strong?!" I explain that changing a diaper has nothing to do with strength, but I do love him. He responds with, "Well I'm strong and not mean and can just do anything I want to do!"

Layn ~ January 25, 2011
My smarty son showed his Taylor side this morning. We're eating breakfast and he got out of the chair without asking, he still had food on his plate. I told him to go back and finish his breakfast that it looked like he hadn't even touched his toast he asked me for. He climbs back in his chair looks at me and puts his finger on his toast, "I'm touching it now mommy so I'm done" and he leaps off the chair again.

Layn ~ January 19, 2011
Layn came up to me today after he came home from school and told me, "Daddy says I can have some...um...dog food."
I stared at him for a moment and something from the previous night clicked in my head from when Sean returned from the store. "Oh you mean a corn dog?"
Layn: "Yeah!"

Layn ~ October 21, 2010
Layn who was dressed up in his police costume again asked me if he could have a drink and I said in a minute. He then asks if he can have a beer and I tell him no that little children don't get to drink beer. His response, "But policemen get to drink beer!"

Layn ~ October 19, 2010
Layn just said to me, "You are a good mommy because you do everything! Make cheese omelettes, do computers, write, paper, color...you're a good mommy because you do things!"

Layn ~ October 17, 2010
Layn decides to move the couch out so he can get to a couple of his cars that he knocked underneath it. I tell him to push the couch back where it belongs and he stares at me with a stern look on his face and replies, "Momma, I'm busy!"

Layn ~ October 8, 2010
Sean was just complaining that his head was hurting. Layn responds with, "That's okay, we'll get you a new head!"

Layn ~ September 16, 2010
While enjoying dinner this evening Layn said to us that the cats don't like spaghetti. Sean misheard thinking he said that the cats stole his spaghetti, so he responded with telling him that cats don't like spaghetti and to try again. I look up and tell Sean that Layn actually said cat dont's like spaghetti and Layn pipes up, "Yeah so try again daddy!"

Layn ~ July 17, 2010
So we were just eatting dinner and Sean had a plastic fork which one of the tongs broke off. Sean immediately said, "Stupid fork!" To which Layn responds with, "No daddy, don't say that! It's a bad word! Do you want to go in the corner?"

Layn ~ April 29, 2010
Alyssa was trying to get Sean's headphones and began fussing when she couldn't reach them. I calmly told her that she didn't need the headphones and I didn't want to hear her making that noise. Layn said, "Mommy you don't hear baby sister Alyssa?" I said no and he asked why. I said it was because she was being silly. His response, "No mommy she is not being silly she is freaking out!"

Layn ~ March 16, 2010
So, Layn was being a complete goofball so I told him he was a fruitcake. He responded, "No, mommy I'm a fruitpie!"

Layn ~ February 4, 2010
(not a quote but a silly action from Layn)
Nothing like hearing your husband tell your three year old son to, "Flush the toilet with your hand not you ear!"






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